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Yes, I’m seriously doing this.  I have lost control of my life.  (but at least I’ll restrict it to the main character)

You see, I got an ask that I answered in shorthand:

Anonymous asked:  "whats the title of spongebob and squidward?“

Spongebob - Bard of Time
Patrick - Bard of Mind
Squidward - Bard of Hope

Just pulled those out of my ass, but it makes a little sense to me I guess.

And then I thought about that first one a bit more.  And the Art Teacher Squidward episode.

And how he drew a circle backwards from a face in that same episode.  And how he was The Quickster in the superhero episode.  And his prodigious Krabby Patty output, how he’s always ‘ready’, on-time, the procrastination episode, showing up everywhere and at all different angles, all the Space stuff he does with his shape and size a destroyer class of Time would naturally ghost etc etc.  Even the destructive repeated time travel in that episode where they went back to help/harm Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy and their efforts to thwart Man-Ray from taking over the city, and ended up re-visiting the moment a thousand times cloneways at the end.

so i guess spongebob is bard of time because he wastes everyone’s time? (also patrick as bard of mind is fucking perfect.)

Yes, pretty much that.

It’s just…

Remember how Spongebob uses Spatulakind, and at one point, 1/2spatulakind.  Recall how he has a trademark piece of 'cool’ eyewear for when he’s serious (jellyfishing).  Imagine Spongebob dialing into a spot on the timeline with a floating pair of Time Patties.  And how often he wears suits.  Imagine him in a god-tier Bard of Time outfit with a sharp-edged triangle hat and a square codpiece.  And now, on top of all that, you’re now suddenly noticing how similar the Spongebob Squarepants theme tune is to Dave’s Accelerate tune, and combining the two in your head.

Think about it.  Quite an image, isn’t it?

(Okay I thought that’d be longer, but that’s all I wanted to say.  Screw you anons for forcing my mind to get carried about these things!  You’re keeping me from starting that Breath and Blood post with out of control weirdthinks.)

2012-10-17